The 7 Biggest Mistakes Parents Make in the College Soccer Recruiting Process
(And How to Avoid Them Without Losing Your Sanity)
If you’ve ever sat on the sidelines wondering whether you’re doing enough — or too much — for your athlete’s recruiting journey, you’re not alone.
I’ve been there. I’ve made mistakes. I’ve learned the hard way.
The college soccer recruiting process is full of unwritten rules, hidden deadlines, and mixed messages. Some mistakes will slow you down. Others can cost your child opportunities. My goal here is simple: help you avoid the pitfalls I’ve seen parents (including myself) fall into, so your athlete has the best shot at finding the right college fit.
Mistake #1 – Starting Too Late (or Too Early)
The problem: Many parents either wait until junior year to think about recruiting or start pushing too hard when their kid is still in middle school.
Why it matters: Too late and you miss opportunities; too early and you risk burnout and turning the process into a chore.
How to avoid it: Understand the real recruiting timeline. There are key ages and dates (like June 15 after sophomore year) that matter. Plan backwards from there.
→ In the Playbook: Year-by-year timeline with key action items.
Mistake #2 – Relying on the Club to Do It All
The problem: Some parents assume the club coach will handle recruiting.
Why it matters: Coaches can help, but they aren’t full-time recruiters for your child. Each club and each team within a club will handle things differently depending on the coach’s willingness to get involved.
How to avoid it: Take ownership. Teach your athlete to email coaches directly, manage highlight reels, and follow up.
Mistake #3 – Focusing Only on D1 Schools
The problem: The “D1 or bust” mindset overlooks amazing opportunities in D2, D3, NAIA, and junior college programs.
Why it matters: More options mean more chances to find the right academic, athletic, and financial fit.
How to avoid it: Encourage your athlete to cast a wide net early. Prestige doesn’t always equal the best experience.
Mistake #4 – Sending the Wrong Kind of Highlight Reel
The problem: Long, unedited game footage and clips that don’t show your athlete’s strengths or skills required for their position.
Why it matters: Coaches have limited time; they need to see your player’s impact quickly.
How to avoid it: Keep it under 5 minutes, start with your best plays, and clearly identify your athlete in each clip.
→ In the Playbook: Highlight Reel Checklist with do’s & don’ts.
Mistake #5 – Not Teaching Your Athlete to Communicate Directly with Coaches
The problem: Parents send the emails, make the calls, and do all the talking.
Why it matters: Coaches want independent, confident players who can advocate for themselves.
How to avoid it: Coach them through what to say, then step back. You can proofread emails — just don’t be the one hitting “send.”
Mistake #6 – Ignoring the Academic Side
The problem: Focusing only on the soccer skills without realizing GPA, test scores, and coursework can make or break opportunities.
Why it matters: Even top athletes can’t play if they can’t get accepted or stay eligible. Plus you are more desirable for coaches if you can stack academic scholarships.
How to avoid it: Keep grades and test prep as high priorities alongside training.
Mistake #7 – Treating It Like a Transaction Instead of a Relationship
The problem: Parents chase offers instead of building genuine connections with programs and coaches.
Why it matters: Coaches recruit people, not just talent.
How to avoid it: Encourage your athlete to show genuine interest, ask smart questions, and follow up after visits and conversations.
The truth is, even the most well-intentioned parents can fall into these traps. The good news? You don’t have to navigate this alone.
That’s why I created the College Soccer Recruiting Playbook — the same roadmap I wish I’d had from Day 1. It covers the entire process from first contact to signing day, with checklists, templates, and strategies that actually work.
Get the Playbook here → and give your athlete the best shot at the right college fit without all the trial and error.